fade
april 9, 2009

i'm too nervous and anxious to sleep
doctor at 10am tomorrow
dad's coming with me
he gets to drive me home in my sedated state again
doc said my throat will probably be sore for a while afterwards
so i just spent today singing everything i felt like i had to sing
hungry right now, but have to fast

this is probably the most painful song i've ever had to write
i felt every word in my skin and bones
if you've read my entries in the past few months
you can probably see how much my thoughts have
been transferred to this song
honestly i broke down after writing every part of this song
maybe that's why there's only two verses

i saw you again
here on my bed
whispering those words that you said
so many times
when you were mine
oh you were mine
you were mine

if you don't see "us" ahead
i'll be behind you instead

i'll say, 'remember to look both ways'
we can't stay here
morning is coming
when i wake
you'll fade

i heard you again
but just in my head
the sound of your voice
and the words that you sang
the scent of your skin
the fit of our hands
who we were
is who i am

remember to look both ways


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